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A non-Venn diagram :)
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When you do something out of obligation, you may feel like you're doing the most caring thing.
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In fact, you may prop yourself up on your silent suffering (especially if you were taught at a young age, maybe from your religious community, that your own suffering for the sake of others' wellbeing gave you the moral high ground).
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You may tell yourself that what you're doing is "selfless", "right", or "good".
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But here's what I've found:
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When I do something out of obligation, I'm not selfless.
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Rather, the care I give is conditional; there is, on some level, an expectation that I will receive something in return.
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Usually: recognition for my efforts or sacrifice, or approval of my good deeds.
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And this expectation, by definition, simply isn't unconditional love.
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It can't be unconditional love if the lack of recognition (or expressed disappointment for doing it "wrong" or not being "good enough") leads me to resent the person for whom I was supposedly expressing care.
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Over time, I've begun to see obligation and resentment as old friends who are simply trying to point me back to what's right and true, for me, in this moment.
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They're nudging me to be honest about what I have to give, and to ask myself if I'm able to give it freely.
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Because only love freely given--with no attachment to outcome, with no expectation of anything in return--is unconditional love.
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(And this is where I want to be!)
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What's interesting is that you may think that *they* aren't unconditionally loving because of the expectation *you perceive* them to have of you.
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But what's beautiful is this: You have a choice.
You have the choice to interrupt the cycle.
To create a new story.
A new reality.
Based in truth.
Your truth.
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And that truly is a gift.
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With you,
xo Liv
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#thecozyquiet #thehealingwild #earthmedicine #earthwisdom #ancestralwisdom #celticshamanism #wildempath #reclaimingsensitive #empath #highlysensitive #intuitiveliving #andlivlovesyou

My experience of obligation is not concrete.
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It’s a mysterious, ever morphing entity.
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It creeps in around the edges, until it casts a shadow that is imperceptible at first.
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So much so, that I can convince myself: “I want to do this”, or “this will be good for me”, or “this will take care of a particular thing/person/task/anxiety” so it’s worth it.
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But eventually the growing darkness makes it difficult to see.
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I find myself grappling with excuses, reasons, self-judgement and resentment.
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Resentment is really a key indicator for me—the canary in the coal mine, the sacred reminder that I’ve gone too far off center.
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Resentment isn’t about anyone else.
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✨ Instead, it’s a sign reminding me it’s time to take decisive and potent action to take care of myself.✨
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It means reversing a decision.
Cancelling plans.
Making a request.
Setting a limit.
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Resentment is a invitation back into my own sacred terrain, my own sovereign ground.
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And it’s always a relief to welcome myself back into my own being and knowing.
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So this is an invitation to open your eyes wide like an owl in the forest night.
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What do you see in the shadows?
And how can you oh-so-gently invite yourself back home?
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With you,
xo Liv
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#thecozyquiet
#wildempath #reclaimingsensitive #empath #highlysensitive #intuitiveliving #thehealingwild #earthmedicine #earthwisdom #ancestralwisdom #andlivlovesyou